Today I received
my tax-free Winter Fuel Payment
of £200 (€280, $310)
available to all 'British'* Pensioners
including millionaires (to whom
of course it is the average posh restaurant tip
- at any rate, a piddl-
I have already bought my winter coal
(shipped to Northern Ireland from Colombia),
so I think I'll spend at least some of the WFP
on a few bottles of excellent Chilean Malbec
from the wine section of my local Lidl.
*'British' means anyone resident in the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland,
even if a Waha'bbite born in Saudi Arabia, an Albanian 'economic migrant', or (like me) an Irish passport-holder living in the above-mentioned tight, tiny, statelet-colony.