Dingo the Dissident

THE BLOG OF DISQUIET : Qweir Notions in the Armpit of Diogenes by DINGO the DISSIDENT binge-thinker here since 2008.

Thursday, 6 October 2022

Christian Morgenstern

said that sheople
don't so much speakle
as quotle and repeatle.

Here is my version of his poem
The Birth of Philosophy :

Sheep glares at me with shock and awe
as though I were the first biped it saw.
Mesmerising glare!  We stand like we're asleep.
It seems the first time that I have seen a sheep.

Morgenstern's Gallows Songs (1905) are well-known amongst German speakers, and influenced Bertolt Brecht as well as Otto Dix.

My Neologism of the Month

is French : PISCINABLE,

an adjective from piscine meaning a pool,
informs you that, in a garden
attached to a house you might be thinking of buying,
a pool might be constructed.

And from this adjective a noun might be constructed:

It contrasts with an English neologism I saw yesterday:


Wednesday, 5 October 2022

After a Gallows Song by Christian Morgenstern.


Imperfect and Perfect Past
drank to a friendship made to last.
They toasted Future Simple tense
(which just shows their common sense).

Conditional and Perfect Plu
decided they would join in, too.

Tuesday, 4 October 2022

Conversation in a pedal-bin.

Tissue 1: 'You wouldn't believe it – I've got snot all through me.'

Tissue 2: 'That's nothing, kid. I stink of semen.'

Tissue 3: 'You've had it easy, sisters – I'm completely saturated with menstrual blood.'

Chorus: So we go to the landfill site,
the landfill site, the landfill site.
Off we go to the landfill site –
diapers, dead dogs and mud.

Monday, 3 October 2022

Dinner without wine

is like sex without laughter.


look much better on equines

than on humans.

The Company of Men*

Eliza Carthy:

I've given blow-jobs on sofas
To men who didn't want me any more.
Why didn't they tell me before ?

Well, they wouldn't, would they ?
They wanted to have their cake and eat it.
Or eat their cake and keep it.
Cake and more cake, with whipped cream.
Love is just a meme...

*Also the title of a book by Romain Gary.

Sunday, 2 October 2022

Beyond Eighty.

It is ridiculous to hold on to life
for the occasional bits of pleasure
you might get hold of through the fog
like food-scraps to a sad but hopeful dog. 

Saturday, 1 October 2022


the assassination of a pig
as much as the shooting of a president.

We are shadows of ignorance
cast over violence.

We don't like human corpses.


I discovered today, was formerly known as
Aleksandrovka, Yuzivka (or Hughesovka),
Stalin and Stalino! 
The inhabitants will be so grateful
if it's renamed Putino.

Friday, 30 September 2022

Life is somewhat like a cucumber.

Other people sow and grow
and harvest it, then you and they
cut slices off it
until the wrinkled end.

As old age advances,

transitioning to a stuffy old fart is disturbingly predictable:

I have become prudish and Puritan, 

like Abrahamic Elders and Paul the Apostle.

Thursday, 29 September 2022

As an 'outsider'

I once identified
(to some extent) as queer or invert
or one of those
because queers were then beyond the pale.

Now I am beyond the pale for queers
and every identity except nonentity.

it's good to be a misanthropic nobody,
especially in a world of pseudo-individuals.

Being nobody is good
provided you can secrete, protect
your nonentity successfully.

(Indeed there is a Catch in everything.)

Wednesday, 28 September 2022


was a term of slight-to-moderate abuse
applied by the English to Europeans east of England,
because, of course, the English could not deny
that they were European – until now
that they are half-American.

Tuesday, 27 September 2022

Ferdinand Laholli

is an Albanian poet
now living in Germany.

He spent the first 30 years of his life in


Here you are afraid to speak,

afraid to be silent.

Here you are afraid to smile,

afraid to be sad.

Here you are afraid

not to be afraid.

more of my translations from the Albanian >

Good to know.


Monday, 26 September 2022

Gloss on Sir Edward

(who was not a Dyer).

My mind to me a torment is.

His was, I think, to Baudelaire.

I'd love to have no consciousness,

be nothing more than gentle air.

Sunday, 25 September 2022

One of my favourite English words :


I imagine a sad cock (male fowl) or parrot,
and indeed:
                     crestfallen (adj.)
"dejected, dispirited," 1580s, creast falne...

 Crest-risen –"proud, lusty" is from 1610s.

Your post titled 'One of my few childhood memories' has been deleted.

 "As you may know, our community guidelines (https://blogger.com/go/contentpolicy)
describe the boundaries for what we 
allow – and don't allow – on Blogger.
Your post titled ‘One of my few  
childhood memories’ was flagged to us for review.
We have determined that 
it violates our guidelines and deleted the post...
Your content has violated our child safety policy."

Saturday, 24 September 2022

You know about civet cats and coffee beans.

– No ?
The civet eats the coffee berries
which soften in its gut and are excreted whole.
They are collected and roasted.
They have a subtle under-taste of cherries.

The Javanese used civets this way in the 18th century
because they were forbidden by the very mean,
very nasty Dutch from entering the coffee-plantations. 
Civets think the berries are delicious.
It was hard to prevent The Thieving Natives
from scooping up their droppings.

Unlike trees,

we all - even newborn babies -

live too long.

Friday, 23 September 2022

"Like a fox nesting

behind a bus depot,
he's a creature making the best of an environment
to which he is in some respects maladapted."

– Ned Beauman, GLOW.

Thursday, 22 September 2022

A yellow life, nice and easy. No eyes needed.

A Gummy Squirrel – Psychropotes longicauda – is a type of sea cucumber. This specimen is 60 cm long with red palps, or lips
with which it feeds on sediment on the ocean floor
5,100 metres below the surface.

The waning of traditional religious cults

has been replaced in Britain by the cult of royalty,

and in the USA by the cult of Trump.

The texture of the sun.


Monday, 19 September 2022

Grotesque hypocrisy and appropriation.

A mathematical genius
hounded for his homosexuality
until he killed himself,
now features on British money.

Longest and highest.

Two beautiful bridges
link the two French départements
of the Aveyron and the Tarn.
The first, a cantilevered railway-bridge, was inspired
by the then-recent Eiffel Tower and built
by the same construction-company
between 1897 and 1902, and had
the widest span of any steel-structure
in the world.

The second (also chosen from an open competition)
is a state-of-the-art, elegantly-curving
motorway suspension-bridge,
so high that fog forms and clouds descend below it.

Thanks to Socialism and the handsome Jean Jaurès
(pacifist, assassinated in 1914) it cost far fewer lives.

But (dear, less handsome, Lord Rogers)
it intrudes upon the landscape rather brutally.

Freedom of speech

just like its suppression

can too easily lead to

the overwhelming of truth.

Sunday, 18 September 2022

Idiopathy - NFNSS

The good news for solosexuals
is that (as in my own case)
masturbation may get better
as you get older
and maybe more creative.

Andrey Kurkov :

Basically, Russians are monarchists and Ukrainians are anarchists.

Just like the difference between the English and the Irish.

Friday, 16 September 2022

One of the thousands

of things that I have never understood
is why people want to be popular
rather than themselves.
I have always been one of the earnest,
uncomprehending Babes in the Wood.

'Floral Tributes'

What majestic tree
was sacrificed
in its prime
to make a coffin
for a figurehead ?

Whence came the flowers
for the thousands of glib
and vulgar 'floral tributes'
to the dead

queen of the Chagos Islands
'cleared' (like the Scottish Highlands)
of their inhabitants,
and lightly, poisonously populated
by the American military instead ?

Thursday, 15 September 2022


is a short-acting sleep-aid
which I have been taking for some years.

It has the side-effect underlined below,
which should be reported to my physician.
'Doctor, this drug is making me feel good.
 Help me to escape its evil clutches.
 Please don't tell Big Brother.'

Our culture cannot tolerate too great a sense of well-being.

Wednesday, 14 September 2022

They have nothing better to do.

As you read this
at least ten million men are masturbating,
at least ten million people women
are being raped,
and a thousand trees are being chopped down
(to be burnt) in the Amazon basin.

"A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do".

Frankly, I prefer

this (by the naif  Morris Hirschfield)

to this (by the creepy Michelangelo).

Hirschfield's painting is so much more fun
that I am happy to be a Philistine.

A nice little exchange on the notorious 4chan.

  Anonymous 09/05/22(Mon)18:10:38 No.4076722   [Reply]

Is becoming a wedding photographer a good idea?

>>4076722 (OP)
Any job where you're directly dealing with the public is a bad idea.
It's not nice to say but a very large portion of people are either very stupid, unreasonable, uncivilized to the point of being antisocial, and any combination of the above.
Even if the vast majority of people you encounter are good and everything goes smoothly, you'll always have a percentage of clients like this, and even it's overall worth it because of the money, doing what you love, etc. you need to question whether it's worth the effect it has on your psychology and the way you see the world and humanity.


Mainly the Palaces,* not the Prisons.

The recently-deceased
fawned-upon monarch
of a shameless, genocidal
United Kingdom (in which
I was born in nineteen-forty-one)
once said to President Mandela that she had
'seen more of Africa than almost anyone'.

Ah, the crassness of the Windsors
and the greyish whites !
But I guess that the saintly Nelson
was well-used to mindless slights.

*and boulevards, and lush plantations in Kenya.

from The Guardian
King Charles’s staff given redundancy notice during church service for Queen.

Exclusive: Employees said to be livid and shaken
as up to 100 Clarence House employees told they could lose their jobs.

Tuesday, 13 September 2022

"Never strike a child in anger"

 – only 'in cold blood' !

(Food for thought.)


which almost everyone has heard of – even me : 

Coca-Cola, Nike, Starbucks, JCB,
McDonald's, Kleenex, the British Royal Family,

Google, YouTube, WhatsApp...but I think
no longer Semtex ('The Stronger
not the drink).

Monday, 12 September 2022


There is a very large number of things
that I don't understand about people –
among them why we, who invented language,
are so frightened of using it to make
'real communication', but, instead, use it
to block other means of communication
enjoyed by animals.

Nor do I understand why I fret so much
about not understanding people.

Friday, 9 September 2022

On Stammering (unkindly called Stuttering).

My best friend (20 years dead)
had a bad stammer.  I had the bad habit
of finishing his sentences when I knew
what he was going to say – which was often.

This may be why he left his rich sister
his considerable estate, and me (living on welfare)
just £50 and some of his books –
which I, being a library-lover, declined.

I used to stammer – until I left school
(but not in French) and would have been delighted
for other people to finish my sentences.
Now I stammer only when angry, especially in French,
and still haven't learned to shut up.


Homeless people and refugees

can't fall further on their knees.

Successor will be Lord of Flies.

Meeting Boris Johnson and Liz Truss together
on Tuesday in her delicate condition was obviously too much,
but she had no option as head of state.

Deferred manslaughter ?  Or a mercy-killing ?

Thursday, 8 September 2022

Why not medicalise racism

like 'they' medicalised
divergent sexuality –

then send diagnosed racists
for Electro-convulsive
and Aversion Therapies ?