When I was a weedy, bookish and cold-rife boy

and was forced to play rugby football at school
three times a week,
soccer-players were pale and ugly
and didn't have beards.

They also had day-jobs.

Now that soccer-players come in beautiful colours
sometimes with neat little beards –
and therefore look sexy (to me),

and are insanely rich,

still nothing would induce me to take an interest
in any team sport, especially not one
between nation-states, played on a pitch.

*However, as a Berber-lover, I hope that Western-Sahara-seizing Morocco beats genocidal France in today's World Cup quarter-finals in obscene Qatar.