As a child, I had such an imagination. With or without others, books or toys, everything seemed magical. Then school came upon me, and I still had those magical summers. But it wore away my imagination until very little was left, the rest being crushed by my father. And the more I mourned its passing, the more I was made to feel guilt for not "growing up". So I hid my mourning, and behaved as a "real man should".
To this day, I grieve for what I lost as a child, and feel guilty for the grieving on top of it.
Often I think I was singularly blessed not to have had a father or any direct male influence in childhood.
I think I have been very fortunate that, in resisting external education, I kept much of my (limited) imagination intact, and was thus able to educate myself in an a necessarily and pleasantly ad hoc way and in only those interests which appealed to my imagination.
In recognising the damage that formal education and your father did to you, you have the wherewithal to regain it - provided only that you are not yourself and do not become a father !
As a child, I had such an imagination. With or without others, books or toys, everything seemed magical. Then school came upon me, and I still had those magical summers. But it wore away my imagination until very little was left, the rest being crushed by my father. And the more I mourned its passing, the more I was made to feel guilt for not "growing up". So I hid my mourning, and behaved as a "real man should".
ReplyDeleteTo this day, I grieve for what I lost as a child, and feel guilty for the grieving on top of it.
Brian L.
Hello Brian-in-Canada,
ReplyDeleteOften I think I was singularly blessed not to have had a father or any direct male influence in childhood.
I think I have been very fortunate that, in resisting external education, I kept much of my (limited) imagination intact, and was thus able to educate myself in an a necessarily and pleasantly ad hoc way and in only those interests which appealed to my imagination.
In recognising the damage that formal education and your father did to you, you have the wherewithal to regain it - provided only that you are not yourself and do not become a father !
Anthony
Never having blighted another with this thing called life, is the pillow of consolation I am able to rest my head upon in the darkest of nights.
ReplyDelete