in the arsehole of diogenes

NEO-HERACLITUS_____________Qweir Notions in the arsehole of Diogenes: weBlog of a septuagenarian Binge-thinker since February 2008.
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Friday, 30 April 2010

Wednesday, 28 April 2010

* Contemporary Poetry

(to Paul Muldoon et mult.al.)

A wave of treated
toxins, chlorinated turds
in a slimy sea
of over-considered
words.


*(in the English language)

Tuesday, 27 April 2010

Non-penetrative sex

is to the cruder kind
as Dhrupad is to Opera.

[Dhrupad is the most contemplative form of Indian Classical music,
usually sung (in solo or duet) by deep male voices,
but also played on the most contemplative instrument,
the Rudhra Vina.
A single Rag can take several hours to perform.]


Monday, 26 April 2010

Thursday, 22 April 2010

A Place to Rest




















The other day I hired a grave
@ 9 euros a year for
the minimum 30 years.

It is in a beautiful, secluded,
empty corner of the graveyard
with a splendid view across
the river to the village.

Others seem to want to rot
in the open, in full sun,
but I prefer my shady Vampire Corner
where I have planted hellebore,
heather, periwinkles, costmary
and wild garlic - though not
because I think the last-named
will be necessary.


Wednesday, 21 April 2010

Heaven

for dog-lovers is full of dogs
for racists has no people of color
for control-freaks is a gulag
      of their very own in the sky
for Jews contains no Gentiles
for Muslims is full of virgins
      for whom there is no competition
for cats is full of mice and small
      endangered, feathered species
for me is gloriously null eternity

Tuesday, 20 April 2010

'Embedded Water'

It takes 130 pints of water
to grow the food and process it
to make a pint of beer.

A cup of coffee "embeds" 140 litres
of water, a cotton T-shirt 2,000 litres,

and 15,000 litres of water (plus
a lot of drugs, husbandry and transport) make
just one kilogram of steak...
for necrophagy's sake!

Sunday, 18 April 2010

Application of Intelligence

It requires only the slightest shift
of mind, and modest application,
to turn oneself
from sexually-deficient
to sexually self-sufficient.

Saturday, 17 April 2010

Women of the World,

unite!
For the men are
faking it
too
-and don't even know
that they're faking it.

Friday, 16 April 2010

NASA

is now working on the logistics
of using the dark side of the moon
as a dump for nuclear waste,

and how to make Mars
habitable for colonising
members of our species
- which is so good at
cherishing planets.

Make haste! O make haste!

Thursday, 15 April 2010

Deuteronomy & Leviticus

Every Christianity
is à la carte
pick 'n' mix doctrine
and morality.

(see Comment for amplification)

Tuesday, 13 April 2010

Monday, 12 April 2010

Friday, 9 April 2010

Mystery

is the natural order of things
which the vanity of our curiosity
imperils with such impertinence.

Wednesday, 7 April 2010

'What is important'

said the great heterosexual chansonnier,
Georges Brassens, 'is the sum total of affection,
tenderness and fellow-feeling
that a man can offer another.'

Tuesday, 6 April 2010

We have the arrogance

to think we're more than
animals ruled by appetites.
But our appetites have become
ingeniously multifarious

and our reason is their
pathetic slave.

Monday, 5 April 2010

Sunday, 4 April 2010

Our skins

feel like
the skins of snakes.
We are one of only two
mammals without fur.

This evolutionary
accident was our
Original Sin.

Friday, 2 April 2010

Optimism's ruthless,

unremitting rays
glare out from almost every human act
and scorch the Earth

which merely adds
to hubristic humanity's self-praise.

Thursday, 1 April 2010

POLICE SAY

(a found poem)

Police say 28-year-old Anthony Coffman
walked into the Jay C. Foodstore,
pulled out a hunting knife
and attacked packages of hamburgers.

When an employee tried to stop him,
police say Coffman lunged at the man
with the hunting knife.

"He told people at the store
that God had sent him there to do that.
And he was trying to save young girls from the beef,"
said Deputy Police Chief David Lutz.

Coffman is charged with criminal mischief,
and criminal recklessness with a deadly weapon.